Today I remembered drawing is an end, not a means.

 I was waiting for the train to my baking course (as it's Wednesday) and was sketching and eating my lunch. I have been sketching more recently and enjoying it more and more, which is awesome, as I have been so out of practise that it feels great to want to do it. It made me really sad to see awesome drawings and things I wanted to draw and feel unable to draw them. I worried that they wouldn't look like what I was drawing. Logically, if I am drawing an entire landscape in 3 minutes before a train it is very unlikely it will look like a photo. And that's not the point. If I want it to look like a photo I could photograph it.

However, having been sketching a lot recently, I have realised that I really like the sketches. That as an image in their own right they are interesting and pleasing and say something. I'm not sure what but I just enjoyed the process, the feeling of it and the outcome.

I felt like I had lost that to begin with. I kept getting irate at my drawings not being perfect, and using them as a way to put my ideas down in order to Photoshop them. There's nothing wrong with that, but my style of drawing never has been and never will be perfectly polished. And it's so much better for it, they're rough and raw and have some character and when you put your mind to it, relax, take your time and think about it, the sketches you produce actually become worth something in their own right.